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By DAVE SIMANOFF The Tampa Tribune
I've got this friend. Let's call him David. No, let's call him Simon. No, his name isn't important.
What's important is that this friend once worked for a boss who seemed to be out to get him.
There was yelling. There were horrible performance evaluations, unfair and mean-spirited. There was an occasional trip to the HR
director, which resolved nothing.
At the end of the day, my friend felt dumped upon. He was buried in assignments he didn't like, and he felt unwanted. And, most
frustrating of all, my friend could never figure out whether his boss was just a difficult guy to get along with or whether he was
actively angling to push me - I mean, my friend - out the door.
Fortunately, my friend's situation ended happily (the boss left), but countless other workers face a similar environment: not knowing
whether they're laboring for someone with a caustic personality but benign motives, or whether their boss simply wants to fire them.
How do you figure out when the boss truly has it out for you? How do you handle a difficult boss if you've decided to fight for your
job? And how do you respond if you discover that your boss really wants to see you gone?
These are the questions my friend - I mean, I - posed to a handful of workplace and career experts. Here's what they said:
Recognize red flags. When you start to feel left out at work, your job is probably in jeopardy. Marie G. McIntyre, author of "Secrets to
Winning at Office Politics," said your job may be in peril if you're finding yourself excluded from meetings, memos and projects that
should involve you.
McIntyre runs Your Office Coach, a consulting firm based in Atlanta. She said another warning sign is what she calls the "Serious
Talk, with capital letters." That's when you're called in to talk about some aspect of your work performance or personality.
"Maybe they'll say you're taking too much time, or you're too high maintenance, or you're asking too many questions, or you're not
collaborating with people," she said. "It shows that somebody's already thinking about you in a problematic way."
Don't ignore the warning signs.
"Sometimes people don't read the tea leaves very well," she said. "Sometimes people just don't want to interpret the signs."
Confront the issue. If there's a problem between you and your boss, don't sit back and wait for things to exacerbate. A workplace
relationship is just like any other relationship - don't expect things to get better if you don't take the initiative to communicate.
Dan Smith, managing partner of staffing and recruiting firm PrincetonOne in Tampa, recommends taking a straightforward but
polite approach.
"Ask for some one-on-one time, and check the validity of your concerns," he said. "Most bosses, I think, are going to respect that."
Make sure to bring up specific examples (such as, "you didn't assign the Henderson account to me") instead of generalities (such as,
"you're mean"), Smith said. Listen to what your boss says.
It's human nature to want to avoid conflict and ignore interpersonal problems, "but to just sit in it and not take any action is just going
to make the situation worse," he said.
Be rational. When you approach your boss, don't be argumentative. Ruth Storrings, director of HR services for Fort Lauderdale-based
AlphaStaff, said fewer than 10 percent of employees confront a boss when they sense problems.
"Of those that do, some of them lose their temper," she said. "Others try to act rationally and say things like, 'Your yelling at me really
causes me to feel like I'm not a good worker.'"
Take into account how often you have problems with a boss and how serious the incidents are, Storrings said.
Trust your instincts. You'll probably sense when it's time to polish your resume.
"Most people know when they're underperforming and when their job is on the line," Smith said.
A poor working relationship could be the product of big egos and esteem issues. Or it might be a signal that you need a different
kind of environment - if you're a creative person, you might chafe at a structured work environment.
"You need to figure out what's imagined and what's real," Smith said.
See the big picture. Look around you. Perhaps you're not the only person having problems with his or her boss. If you see a lot of
unhappy workers, power struggles, gossip and backfighting, "you probably just want to get a new suit for job interviews because
you're probably in a toxic work place and want to get out," McIntyre said.
However, "if everyone else is happily rolling along in their career … then it may be more about you than the place," she said.
You may want to consider pursuing a different career, she said. Also, it's possible that you have unrealistic expectations about your
job and that you might be difficult to work with.
Fear change. A change in management could spell problems for your career, McIntyre warns. A department or companywide
reorganization that strips you of your title, location or responsibility could be a sign your job is on the line, she said.
New leaders could also mean new problems.
"I think the most hazardous time for people in terms of job security is when they get a new boss," she said. Employees might
compare their new boss with the old one, or they may think they don't need to prove their worth to the new boss.
"All of a sudden, their career starts going down the tubes," she said. "Recognize that it's a whole new day."
THE WARNING SIGNS
Know these red flags. If you notice any of them at work, make an appointment to talk with your boss - or start revising your
resume.
•You feel ostracized or excluded in the office
•You're not told about meetings that you should be attending
•You're not receiving the kinds of memos and e-mail messages you once did
•Information you need for your job is being kept from you
•People, especially supervisors, avoid you
•Assignments that should go to you now go to someone else
•You're getting assignments that should logically go to someone else
•Your responsibilities or title are changed
•Your boss wants to have a talk with you about your performance
•Your boss isn't communicating with you the way he or she used to
•You're asked to talk with someone in the Human Resources department
Reporter Dave Simanoff can be reached at (813) 259-7762 or dsimanoff@tampatrib.com. His boss reassures him that being asked to
write about warning signs in the workplace is not, in and of itself, some kind of warning.
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